From Therapist to Transformed Parent: My Journey of Healing and Growth

Jessica Bennett • October 26, 2024
From Therapist to Transformed Parent: My Journey of Healing and Growth

As a therapist specializing in attachment trauma, I thought I had done all the work. I'd been through extensive therapy and spent years helping others navigate their own healing journeys. 


But becoming a mother changed everything. 


Suddenly, all the things I'd spent my life avoiding came rushing to the surface, and my professional expertise couldn't shield me from the raw reality of parenthood.


Despite my background in mental health, I found myself struggling with the day-to-day challenges of parenting. I visited multiple therapists, seeking guidance on how to handle difficult situations with my children. 


What I discovered was a fundamental limitation in traditional therapy – while therapists are skilled at addressing emotional and psychological concerns, the boundaries of the therapist-patient relationship often restrict them from providing specific parenting strategies or detailed behavioral guidance. 


The therapists I saw could only offer conventional approaches like timeouts and traditional discipline methods. Deep down, I knew I didn't want to parent this way, but I lacked the knowledge and insights to articulate why, let alone find alternatives that aligned with my values.


This experience gave me a unique perspective on both sides of the therapeutic relationship. As a therapist myself, I understood the constraints of our professional boundaries, yet as a parent, I felt the frustration of needing more concrete, practical guidance than therapy alone could provide.


In my desperate search for answers, I turned to Google with perhaps the most honest query I could type: "How do I be a better parent?" 


This led me to discover parent coaching, and with my all-or-nothing personality, I dove in headfirst. I even worked with a parenting coach who specialized in Internal Family Systems (IFS), but I still felt something was missing. I needed more – a complete transformation.

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When I found Jai's program, several things stood out: the intensive nature of the curriculum, the experiential learning approach through weekly group sessions, and most importantly, the focus on attachment. 


Other programs I researched seemed too brief or surface-level. I knew I needed something comprehensive – a ground-up, foundational overhaul – not just for my role as a mother but also to enhance my ability to serve my clients effectively.


What many people don't realize is that mental health providers often face their own parenting struggles. In fact, many of my current clients are therapists themselves.

 

Many of us entered this field because of our own wounds and challenges, often rooted in childhood experiences. These issues don't magically disappear when we become parents – if anything, they become more apparent and urgent.


The transformation I experienced through the program was profound. The most significant change? I no longer go to bed each night drowning in guilt. I can wake up in the morning feeling confident that I'm giving my children what they need. Even writing this brings tears to my eyes, because the shift has been so meaningful. I've learned how to properly repair relationships with my children, and the guilt and shame that once created barriers between us no longer hold the same power.


Do I still sometimes struggle with feelings of worthlessness, shame, guilt, and fear? Of course. But these emotions no longer interfere with my relationship with my children the way they used to. I honestly can't imagine where my family would be if I hadn't taken this step to transform my parenting approach.


This journey hasn't just improved my personal life – it's revolutionized my professional practice as well. While I previously worked with anyone dealing with attachment trauma, I've now refocused my practice to specifically support parents. I find I can see things I was blind to before, particularly in understanding the complex dynamics between parents and children. I've gained a deeper appreciation for how traditional "power-over" parenting approaches can manifest in various areas of life, creating patterns that ripple through generations.

This new understanding led me to create Cycle Breaking Mom, a coaching membership specifically designed for parents who recognize how their childhood trauma and attachment wounds affect their parenting. 


We meet weekly in groups, creating a powerful community of individuals committed to breaking generational cycles. What makes this work so meaningful is that everyone involved understands that real change requires more than just reading a parenting book or joining a Facebook group – it demands a deep personal transformation.


To my fellow therapists who might be struggling with their own parenting challenges – you're not alone. Our professional training, while valuable, doesn't automatically translate to confident, connected parenting. 


Sometimes, our deepest growth comes from acknowledging that we, too, need support and guidance. Adding parent coaching certification to your practice isn't just about expanding your professional toolkit – it's about transforming both personally and professionally in ways that will benefit not only your own family but also the families you serve.


Looking back, I realize that my journey from struggling parent to confident coach wasn't just about acquiring new skills – it was about healing my own wounds and finding the courage to parent differently. And in doing so, I've found my true calling: helping other parents break free from generational patterns and create the connected, loving relationships they've always wanted with their children.


This transformation wasn't easy, but it was worth every challenging moment. Because now, when I look at my children, I don't see just my struggles and fears – I see opportunities for connection, growth, and healing. And that makes all the difference.

Kiva Schuler

Meet Your Author, Jessica Bennett

Jessica Bennett is a Licensed Professional Counselor and has spent over a decade working with patients with hundreds of people suffering from addictions and PTSD.


She graduated from The Jai Institute for Parenting in November 2022 and holds additional specializations in EMDR and family systems counseling. You can find her online at https://cyclebreakingmom.com


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