Family Transformations: Parent Coaches Crystal & Rae Stampley

Meet Jai Certified Parent Coaches, Crystal & Rae Stampley! 

They are joining forces as a couple to bring their powerful work out into the world, while watching their own lives and parenting transform in the process.

Graduation Date: 2018



Question 1: What inspired you to become a parenting coach through the Jai Institute?

Crystal: I never thought I wanted to be a parent until I met my husband and we decided to start a family together. I had never really dreamed about what parenting would look like or what it should look like. But I approached it in such a way that, if I'm going to do this, I want to do this in a way that felt right to me. I wanted to research and approach it like my most important job on this earth. So, while conscious parenting came naturally, I pursued the certification because I felt like there was under-representation of conscious parenting coaches in the Black community and I felt like it was a great opportunity for me to share this knowledge.

Rae: It started when Crystal went through the program. I didn't have a desire at the time to do it, but once she went through it, the reasoning behind our parenting was different. Although we're husband and wife, I was parenting differently. When she went through the course, she said to me, “I think this would be something for you, in two ways. It would be good to help you to understand some of the things that you may have experienced and have not been able to put into words from your childhood.” I didn't have a bad childhood at all, but just in general. It's really helped to uncover some childhood trauma which has been really helpful. It started before the class, but the class has put words to it.

Then there was the business aspect. We decided that it would be something that we could pursue from a business standpoint. So it was important to get the knowledge and understanding and a structure on how exactly to do this.

Question 2: What obstacles or fears did you need to overcome to enroll in the training?

Crystal: I didn't really have any. I just knew it was something that I was passionate about and it was just the next step.

Rae: Not directly. It was more, it was more because of COVID. There weren't really any obstacles. The timing just made sense. I felt like, “we have a little time, let's go do this now.”

Question 3: What was the best part of the training you received?

Crystal: I would say working with our empathy partners and the cohort that I went through the program with. I formed some really meaningful, strong friendships and relationships with the people that I went through the course with. The fact that we were able to share our experiences and really help each other through the process and see each other's growth. That was a really great component of the program.

Rae: Being able to apply the things that I'm learning now, currently in my own parenting. A lot of times I would parent out of the tradition in which I was parented, and now I have a different set of tools to use instead of just defaulting towards tradition. I'll literally come from a class and then apply new tools that very same day because it's fresh.  It's about applying a new process and then watching and working at it.

Question 4: How has this program impacted you and your family?

Crystal: Even though we had been conscious parenting from the very beginning, it provided us with additional tools and the ‘why’ behind conscious parenting. The why behind why it is so important. It also gave me language to be able to share what I was going through and what I was experiencing with my husband, in a way that he could relate to.

I think people don't recognize that, while this is a conscious parenting certification course, you will not only impact the lives of your children and the connection that you have with your children, but it also positively impacts your marriage and your partnerships and your relationships with other adults. Because it's not just conscious parenting. It's conscious interaction, it's conscious communication, it's conscious connection, and that transcends any relationship.

Rae: The second part of Crystal’s answer was it for me. The fact that, while this was something I was doing to understand my childhood and understand how to parent my kids, I now use it in every form of relationship, whether it's clients that I have, my extended family or my wife. Crystal and I definitely  have reached a different level of communication with each other from this course. So it's definitely a lifestyle change. This is not just for parenting. I think that's the hook for some people I want to help. Now that I understand my kids and how to parent this way, it applies to any relationship you would have with anyone in terms of respect and empathy. It’s life changing.

Question 5: Tell me about your business, how are you using what you learned?

Crystal: My business partner, Yolanda Williams, and I started Conscious Parenting Time, a digital village for Black parents who are interested in, or are already on their own conscious parenting journey. We are answering the call of people that look like us, that don't see people that look like them in this community. Now we have an online community of over 10,000 parents and caregivers across the world that are raising carefree, spirited, Black children. 

We’ve essentially created an environment where Black parents can really relate to this work. We're communicating in a way that other Black people can relate to. A lot of us have similar cultural experiences, so being able to speak to parents through that lens really helps.

And Rae, how about for you? You're still in the middle of the course, is your plan to join Crystal?

Rae: Yes, we will join forces and offer conscious parenting coaching for couples.

Question 6: What are you most proud of accomplishing?

Crystal: Every time anyone shares a conscious parenting win, no matter how big, no matter how small. Because that is one seed of connection that is planted that will continue to grow and flourish between that parent and child.

Rae: I'm starting to solve some of the questions that I've had from my own childhood. It's allowing me to heal properly. Being able to go through this and to be able to heal, now I can turn around and help someone else do the same. Because you can't help someone when you're not whole yourself. Going through this is allowing me to get whole. So I feel very empowered at this point.

Crystal: When you asked the question about what the most impactful thing has been, it's really been interesting for me to watch Rae going through the program. I always felt like Rae was a great father. I have always had an awesome partner in terms of conscious parenting. When I decided I wanted to go through the certification, he was very supportive. I would come up with all of these like ideas on how I would like to parent our kids, and he was always on board. So when he decided to become certified, I wasn't really expecting much of a change in him in terms of how he parents. But I can honestly say that I have seen such a change in so many ways. The way he communicates with our kids has become even more connected and effective, even though there was never any problem before. There's just something different about him and it's really incredible to see that growth.